Forever Rose
by Elna11
Summary: Number 1 in a series of diaries for Rose DeWitt Bukater's life from age 11. Hope you like it, please R-R. Will include life before, on and after Titanic. I am always open to suggestions for the story, PM's and Reviews!
1. Chapter One: Arrogant

_**Hiya**** everyone! This is going to be a series of diaries in the perspective of Rose DeWitt Bukater, before and after the events which occured on Titanic.**_

**_I do not own anything Titanic!_**

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May 7th, 1906

Dear Diary,

Mother insists that I be on my best behaviour today. I wanted to strike up an argument, but Mother told me that if I misbehaved, my new watercolour paints would be confiscated for a whole _month!_ Father said that was unreasonable; but Mother is relentless. I don't even want to go to this stupid dinner party. I heard that many important people shall be there, including the Mayor. Trudy (my maid, and my only true friend) is on strict orders by guess-who to stick me in a corset tonight. I have only ever worn a corset once - on my 11th birthday - and I wished not to repeat the experience. Trudy is so kind, I do not think she will do my corset too tight, otherwise I shall feel very betrayed. I must go now because if Mother caught me writing down my private thoughts, she'll completely lose her temper! So Goodbye for now, Diary.

_Rose DeWitt-Bukater_

_Later_

Dear Diary,

I did not enjoy the party this evening. I was introduced to this rich man, who I was told I must call "Mr. Hockley", and he did not stop trying to impress me all evening! I am only 11! The nerve of some men, thinking they own the world. I swear, when I'm older, I will show the world everything a woman can do! Plenty more things a woman can do, I think, than a man! Mother believes that a proper lady belongs at home, with a rich husband and a child or two. The woman can't take care of her own child, of course, because the maid and nanny have to do that. I had a nanny, and believe you me I did not prosper from it. Father is much more passionate about life. He is an important businessman. But, at heart, I think that he is really a caring soul who wants to run away and do something else with life. If ever he decides to do so, I will _make _him take me as well, but if he doesn't, when I am old enough, I will abandon this life completely.  
If I have to live with the arrogant nature of the folk at Mother's party, I definetly will!

Dreadfully sorry to rant about how ungrateful I am for my position. Goodnight.  
_Rose._


	2. Chapter Two: Crave

_**Hiya**** everyone! This is going to be a series of diaries in the perspective of Rose DeWitt Bukater, before and after the events which occurred on Titanic.**_

**_I do not own anything Titanic!_**

* * *

July 20th, 1907

Dear Diary,

_How very un-agreable. _That was the 3 words I always heard from Mother when we went shopping together. She never lets me buy a lavender dress, lavender shoes, not anything. It's so unfair! She always gets me something in a muted shade of blue, pink or green. Occasionally yellow or red. It is always the same with Mother when I'm 18, I am going to be my own woman, and I cannot wait! Father said he'll give me some money to tide me over while I settle down into adult life when I leave. Mother wants me to get married at age 16. Can you imagine, me, married, in 3 years? My, the very thought! Only if I am madly in love, the I will marry, whether the man is rich or poor.

Today we went for a leisurely stroll round the garden of our grand old Philadelphian house. I brought Poppy with me, and the daft dog nearly ripped my skirt with excitement when I tried to pick her up. Mother looked down her nose at me and Poppy, but the little Spaniel just carried on flapping around like a trapped bird in my arms.  
"Do put the poor dog down, dear. You'll rip your dress." Mother concealed her dying patience with her little sing-song voice. I just stood there, with Poppy jumping about, glaring at Mother. "I shall not." I replied stubbornly.  
"Rose, put Poppy _down._" Father instructed. I knelt and put Poppy back on the floor, whilst Mother and Father watched contentedly. Father gripped his walking stick tightly as we carried on walking. I skipped along behind, sniffing all the flowers growing in the trees and bushes. When we approached the pond, I crouched to watch a dragonfly skim the surface, along the beautiful Water Lillies.  
"Rose!" Mother screeched, seeing me among the dirt and grass. I stood up and marched back to the house. I slammed my bedroom door, and was in the right mind to smash my mirror and stamp on all my jewellery. Argh!

That's how I got to writing this entry. I don't think I'll go down for dinner tonight. I shall ask Trudy to bring my tea up. I must come across as such a hot-head. I just have so many unexplained emotions at the moment! I am craving love, and I want to be loved. I want friends. I want to be myself!

_Rose-Is-Such-A-Hot-Head._


	3. Chapter Three: He's Listening

_**Hiya**** everyone! This is a series of diaries in the perspective of Rose DeWitt Bukater, before and after the events which occurred on Titanic. Rose's father was 'supposed to have died when she was 10', so I tweaked it a lil' bit and made her 13 =)  
Please Please Please Review! **_

**_I do not own anything Titanic!_**

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October 25th, 1908

Dear Diary,

_Oh my! _  
I am in mourning, Dearest Diary, for once again I have to witness a tragedy in my life. My dearest Father has passed away, and at the worst time as well! Mother discovered a trove of horrible debts from my Father a few days ago, and he died before paying _any _of them back! How will we survive now? Maybe my wish will come true? Or, maybe... Mother will really make me marry at age 16...

I hate to think that Mother will place the burden on securing our family's fortune onto _my _shoulders, and I find it dreadfully unfair. I know plenty of facts to understand that I am not the worst off in the world. But to me it seems I am the worst off in the world. I cannot abide by my Mother's rules.

_Rose._

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October 30th, 1908

Dear Diary,

Today, it was Father's funeral. I was dressed entirely in black lace and satin, as Mother wished. I couldn't object at a time like this. Many people attended, strangers and friends alike. Many I hadn't seen since I was small, others not that long ago. It wasn't just a funeral to me. I think it also acted as a reunion.

Father had an open casket. He was dressed in his best black suit, and polished shoes. His greying hair was slicked back. He looked as if he was attending a party. His eyes had darkened circles, and his skin was pale. I placed one last kiss on his forehead and put a long rose onto his chest. That was his favourite flower.

The party afterwards was solemn to me. I didn't feel like dancing. I didn't feel like eating. Maybe I would just sit in solitude until my 18th birthday. Is it alright if I just slipped away for a little while?

I crept past Mother and her company and went outside to the graveyard. I looked where Father had just been buried and sat down next to the grave. I told Father all the things I had wanted to say before, but couldn't. I told him about Mother. About the dresses, my dreams, my nightmares. Somehow I thought he was listening.

_Rose Is Going Mad._


	4. Chapter Four: Christmas

_**Hiya**** everyone! This is a series of diaries in the perspective of Rose DeWitt Bukater, before and after the events which occurred on Titanic.  
Please Please Please Review! **_

**_I do not own anything Titanic!_**

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December 22nd 1909

Dear Diary,

Mother has retired to bed early tonight, so I am in the sitting room infront of the twinkling lights of the Christmas Tree. Trudy is doing some sewing on one of my dresses in the corner, because Mother refused to have me in a room by myself. I am 14, for Heaven's sake! It is only me, Mother, Trudy and Emilie (Mother's maid) in the house now on a day to day basis. We had to sell some of our things to pay back some of the gambling debts Father had left behind. The pretty gilded mirror in the hallway, the grand piano, a few diamond necklaces. None of it went cheap, thank God. I am finishing my education next year, before we use the last of our funds to send me to finishing school. There I will stay for a year, and then we'll start looking for a (wealthy) husband for me. I am looking forward to every second!

_Rose._

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December 25th 1909

How thoughtful! I got a decent amount of presents today. My favourite was from Trudy and Emilie, who bought me a red hardback diary for when I leave next year. How nice! Mother got me a new dress and shoes, and my Grandparents in New York sent me a new set of jewellery and a series of Jane Austen books. I have read _Pride and Prejudice_, and found it quite fascinating how Lizzie Bennet managed to look past the arrogant exterior of Mr. Darcy and find a kind interior. Maybe I'll be able to do that if Mother chooses a disagreable husband for me?

_Rose!_


	5. Chapter Five: Finishing School

_**Hiya**** everyone! This is a series of diaries in the perspective of Rose DeWitt Bukater, before and after the events which occurred on Titanic.  
Please Please Please Review! **_

**_I do not own anything Titanic!_**

* * *

September 12th 1910

Dear Diary,

Mother is buying (somehow) a hoard of new dresses for me for when I leave in a weeks time. I think I shall leave this diary after this day, because I shall start in my new Red Diary I got for Christmas! I am going to leave this diary at home, I think, so it doesn't get lost or damaged. I have this splendid dress on. Grandmother sent me it on my birthday. It is a white blouse, and over the top of the blouse is a red dress with billowing skirts. I love it! Mother has bought me some new things, like I said earlier, but I prefer my Grandmama's taste in fashion to Mother's. She has bought me some pale pink dresses, a new corset, a dress in muted grey with white net underskirts, some woolen tights, shiny black shoes and an emerald green dress that is STRICTLY for special occasions only. I am taking some old dresses as well, and my jewellery box. Mother says that I shan't take any of the shell jewellery I bought in sunny Florida, and only the expensive jewels. I might sneak my shells in my coat pocket though. I'm just a rebel like that!

I am partially excited for this because I won't be listening to Mother's constant whining, but instead, some teachers whining at me. Maybe I'll get my bestest behaviour, get my best reports, and convince Mother to let me go then? Nah, that won't work will it. I'll get there!

_Rose._


End file.
